I read about a couple too old to adopt. That spoke to me. I'm 48. Predictably too old to adopt. Then I thought of the neighbor I had. Elderly man. Store owner. Used to give Justin & me candy. I could do like him. Give candy to kids. I'm graying. This is a liberating feeling. Being blood bought is nice. You can be doomed as doom is all you see. I see no hope. Stimulus left me. Adoption agencies would reject me. I mourned. Then God reminded me of the elderly neighbor. I could give sugar free candy to kids, grandfatherly.
May 30
dream career is writing ministry 2k words a dy 10k every fri proofed sat then mailed to my literary agent sat. who finds the $10 e-pamphlet 300 buyers every wk, then sell the pamphlet on 1m addresses then buy me & Andrea an inner city downtown condo. my spiritual will be fed by my study. i still need social unfortunately. that's fed by st pete senior center. but i often get in trouble by ordering a big black beautiful coffee. i sleep 8-3. last night, i slept 8-1, 5 hrs,so i will lay in bed till 3... 7 hours sleep, which is best. my writing 2k words a day gives me the motive to continue my richard simmons exercise, which are why im always craving sugar, something I get very little of. please pray I get a job freelance writing 2k a day $3k a week funding all andrea & my expenses. most important every $1 i get i give the nearest Christian publisher $.20. tithes are $.10. the richest ppl in my family were the most miserable. look at great papa jb, the town owner. he gave ...
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